One of the things I am continuously evaluating when I am writing is if someone I know will think a particular character is about them, or assume it is about someone else we both know. As a general rule, I don’t write the people I know. Part because none of the people I know would ever or have ever ended up in the situations or worlds that I have written. But also part because I feel like writing about people I know would just be awkward.
This doesn’t mean that people won’t draw assumptions on their own. The worst in my opinion would be if someone thought I was upset about something, holding on to something, or latently dealing with something I wasn’t. Sometimes a good story is just a good story (or hopefully a good story since I am not the most impartial of judges on this account).
This is only really an issue with family members in friends. I, for one, have never read through say a murder mystery and assumed that the writer made the aunt crazy because they had aunt issues. For me, the idea of a stranger reading my book or writing is much easier than family